Yes, I've Changed.

Yes I did...tell you something.
I've worked so hard being so different.

To Cold To even Care...
To Busy To Reply...
To Dark To even Stare..
To Smile To kill...
I've known a lot since I became this...
Really? Just face it...Look to those who don't even support you. why care, why reply when they don't reply when you text them. Dark? Yup accept it anyway, I am not interested in you. I smile that's how I play it. Revenge. Revenge in those smiles that what interests me. Don't judge, cuz when your in it, you'll know what best describe you when you deal with you unusual circumstances or I could say experiences that disappointed you the most. I stop caring, I stop staring, I stopped replying. And I don't even give a damn thing about it. I love it that way. I will be this...Accept it or not. You don't really matter to me no more. Peace to all... CAT^^

Midnight cast and the Ultimate destiny

Windy midnight cast

Along the path way

I walk into

a large crowd amassed for the parade

a parade of one style; I see 

 the mass destruction springs to mind

 goes along the twine string in the square of the city

it is for the mankind's only hope

and of course mankind today.

Is it the fate of mankind?

grisly fate

or the eternal destiny?

I believe it is the manifest destiny. 

their ultimate destiny; I see

 

Fresh Start

There is a time where you see yourself each day with a new fresh start.
Getting what you always wish for.

Off you go being someone you aim to be. My name is Rawan AlHussaini.
A young writer; you could say… 

21 years old college student studying as a major in graphic design and soon will appear as a writer.
Things has changed for a while since I am more mature now.
 As a child I was someone who wouldn’t even try to cooperate with anyone or even try to participate in any event what so ever. I tend to be left alone for hours, as you know…
you get to be isolated from everyone when you try to stay away from the ones you love.
 Since then I grew up to be someone very weak.
I couldn’t even say hello to a random stranger who I actually known for long.
Since I entered college things has been unstable for quite long.
I believe that I am the master of my own fate.
 Something I have to understand throughout my life things are going to change and soon it will.
People grow mature and become more aware of things, as I do right now.
Not knowing who they hurting in the process but I got hurt many times.
 And what I mean is, I got really hurt by my loved ones; I thought of them as family.
 I know it’s difficult and its gave me a hard time to decide what was the reason of this, but found out it wasn’t that important and there isn’t a reason.
 I know I tend to be clingy sometimes, but I believe no one is perfect.
The problem is I care too much.
When you do, you get out of hand, you can’t control yourself anymore when you actually go through that direction. you get weaker and weaker.
I feel I need to have a break, and try to change my personality and my life right now…
But to me…do not victimize yourself in your circumstance and I believe it’s true.
I realize you are in control always. I ha've been through alot lately, moreover lost a friend...and my advice is
 you must use the potential inside you to realize you are still an extraordinary person
without your best friend. (I always keep saying this to myself)
talking to all your past friends didn’t worked out, we all must realize the
friendship might have been worth it in the past, but not anymore.
 We all have a part that we all have to do, but unfortunately that may not be enough.
It will take time to get over this, but we all have to keep encouraging ourselves to become better.
Every day we wake up in the morning…realize it’s a new day…
we need to enjoy every movement of it. Love and accept yourself and be prepared to be
friendly with everyone in our path. The same thing happened to me with my friends.
I am now independent and not part of a friend chain.
I own myself as a person and can be whoever I want. Walk freely and be lively.
I am sure It will make me more confident and prone to face any social situation.
Again...another advice is
The more we tell ourselves that we have a future regardless of our best friend loss or
any other situations, the more content we'll become.
  we should not  put pressure on ourselves or be too hard on our daily life.
we should set motivation and take baby steps and I'm sure all of us can do it.

Pointed It Out!

This one.

Yes, I like it.

Don't you see.

Its beautiful isn't it.

Reminds me of us.

-smiles-

This is like the first time we've met.

For years, we were pushed away.

But, were okay, right?

-holds hands-

Excuse me, I want to buy that, how much is it?

Madam, It's cost $250.

Alright, I'll get one of that.

-Pointed It Out!-

Put it there, its looks nicer up here.

Nah, its looks better up there.

Alright, as you like.

I told you, this is like the dream come true.

Us standing infront of it.

Feelings of Joy.

You need coffee?

Hey, were did you go!

I told you I'm going to have a cup of coffee.

Oh, Alright.

Anyway, you do your thing, and I'm going stand right infront of this.

-Pointed It Out!

Night and Day, waking up just standing infront of it.

No responses.

Not even comunicating.

Like living in a different world.

-stares-

Opens the door.

Packs her things.

Left her there.

Left her there standing.

Days has passed.

Looking for her.

Calling her.

-picks the phone-

Where did you go?

Where did I go? Mmm...

thats explains it well, you are no longer exist in my life dear.

Go find someone else.

WHAT! No!

Wait!

What's happening...

What's wrong with you.

What's wrong with me.

I left the apartment three days ago, and you even didn't notice me.

You stood standing like I don't exist anymore.

You waste my time.

I stood standing?

What do you mean?

Are you out of your mind?

Your standing facing it day and night and you think you say what I mean?

Srsly...you need help!

Can I see you?

No!

I need your help!

No, I don't wanna see you.

My apartment is on fire!

What!

Wait!

I'm coming now!

Too Late.

Her apartment fell apart.

Everything got destroyed.

Everything is a Mess.

Except this.

What are you saying?

It's torn out!

No its not!

Its fine, look at it.

Its beautiful.

Wake up!

Your in a shock I know!

Your bleeding!

I need to take you to the hospital right now.

Everywhere she goes she looks at painting that looks the same.

Painting of two person holding hand.

The first time they have met.

First time they have been together for long.

Painting of them.

What is wrong with you!

Wake up!

All you see is us!

Yes!

I see!

We are together!

You saved me!

You took care of me!

This brought us together!

Even though it torns out, were together!

-pointed It Out!-

Holding hands tightly.

Not even letting you go.

Don't worry.

I won't  go anywhere.

I'm here, protecting you.

But please forget about this painting.

This painting got us in a mess.

Alright.

We are together, even though the painting is torn out.

We won't rely on it.

Yes your right!

-Picks Her Up-

Cloud Nine

Touched me so carefully and cautiously.

Holding me like I'm about to escape.

 A wounded rythm.

We latched into a crew who were making music. 

Lots of noises.

Cat smiled.

lots of sounds.

Its been two weeks.

days as past so quick and never knew where we were.

Since then, things wern't right.

after two month of us breaking up; I actually smiled without

faking happiness.

But it wasn't that day that made me smiled.

It was a different person.

Cloud Nine, is what that person discovered.

I, Cat adores that person.

Nicknamed as Cloud Nine.

Cloud Nine was away for couple of weeks.

Cat never helped it, until found someone else.

And hopefully learn from mistakes.

Cat never thought Cloud Nine will be coming home soon.

Not just an amazing person, but artistic.

Played music.

A leader of  a band.

Alternative Rock.

A band similar to a favorite band I listen to.

Cloud Nine is who makes those noises.

It what made me heal.

Cloud Nine is almost there.

waiting for me at the airport.

I ran.

Hugged, never let go.

Sat somewhere.

Somewhere, no one can find us.

Somewhere Cat and Cloud Nine can have a bit of privacy.

Somewhere they can be alone.

And this is where Cat ends up listening to her first album Wounded rythm with 

her favorite band Cloud Nine.  

Sketch

Sketch you say.

I'm pretty sure I heard you right the first time.

I, Cat, the writer, not just any writer, but soon an author. 

The place, where I'm from, the sketches I made, is where I belong.

I hit play, everytime there is a cut, I hit pause, I draw the frame, and hit it until it cuts again.

I, Cat speaking from where I am now,  it is not enough to watch a film; and not

enough to look at someone's else drawings. 

The Sketch.

Yeah, I know you just said it a couple of seconds ago.

I sit there, facing you; If I’ve only met you a few times, I recall you in terms of a general impression and descriptive words. 

I have no picture of you in my head. It’s kind of crazy that I’ve gotten this far in this field without a mind’s eye.

I looked up facing you again; listen to what you have to say; Why Sketch?

I sketch to make my world into something more fantasy; more realistic.

Sketches that I made linked to something unusal.

perhaps you know what I mean.

Pictures are just simliar to words, but shown differently.

I, Cat, is what I am to describe.

Who is Cat, who is me and why sketch?

I, Cat is a artistic writer, who not just a writer, but a sketcher, sketches life time.

A life time, that had taught me something really important; shots and frames.

Shots is snapshot of my daily life; what I do, where I go, and who I communicate with.

All of those snapshots is what best describe a sketcher.

Frames, is what you put each snapshot into a frame, to able to present daily life.

Not all shots could be your life, but a simple story of what your trying to explain.

Cat, which is me, have alot of concerns.

Concerns my life time, is why I sketch.

Now dear, you really understood what I do.

My buddy, "Yeah I do, you explain it clearly."

Great then, I said.

Is this how it begins?

Yeah, this is how you should do.

Well, I got to go, I might pass your office tomorrow if you don't mind?

Yeah, sure, why not, I said.

And this is how I sketch every snapshot of the day; Cat and my buddy.